‘You are now BEAUTIFUL again…’
Those were his EXACT words yesterday in church and this was EXACTLY how I looked that day he said it.
I heard the above statement at my first Sunday back in DCC Lagos post-delivery and I had made the effort. Effort to look good. You see, these days, i had to MAKE THE EFFORT to look ‘BEAUTIFUL AGAIN’.
Frankly my initial reaction to that line was first shock, then I asked ‘AGAIN?’ and then I threw my head back and laughed and laughed and laughed and said I was definitely writing a blog post titled that. You see, he didn’t know when he said that and if he could take those words back, he would have cos he had protested that he didn’t mean it ‘quite like that’. But no need, he was speaking quite the truth.
You see that famed pregnancy GLOW??? I had it first and second trimester. I was feeling all ho’ and sexy mama…
I wore heels, dressed up and took pictures all the time. I was H-O-T. I got all the compliments from work, church, strangers, neighbours, ANC/Hospital etc. Everyone who knew I was preggy paid me the sweetest compliments and I always heard ‘Wow, you don’t look pregnant, even with the bump.’
My doctor always teased that I had refused to look my ‘status’ what with the gowns and jeans I didn’t stop wearing. Add that to the fact that my health was tiptop. No issues whatsoever. Infact, my strength levels were WOW!!! I was POSTER GIRL for ‘How to be preggy, Hot and oh-so-FAB!!!’
Physically, I was fine. Medically, I was fine. Spiritually, I was fine. Peace and joy to the world, ho ho!!!Then wham, enter December, month 7, trimester 3 and I started bloating all over. Or let’s just call it what it is, I started getting FAT,
my nose and face widened, my color got darker and NO it wasn’t glowing anymore, my digits got swollen, fave shoes didn’t fit no more, my ring was confined to my bag because it was now war to take it off and I didn’t want it to get stuck and have to be broken, hot cloths didn’t fit no more, my natural hair(styles) were now more messy that trendy, etc. Infact, If insisted on using HOT as an adjective around me, you probably meant HOT MESS!!!
*exhales*
Let me tell you what made it incredibly worse. My strength levels dipped. I would go to bed tired and wake up TIRED. I started having headaches. My toothache peaked too at night when I lay down so I was getting little sleep at night. And even when I slept during the day, I would wake up TIRED still. So in addition to not looking ‘beautiful’ AGAIN, I felt worse. I especially hated how tired I always felt. Bear in mind that I had stopped work already and was in Bonny Island. I was frustrated and ate more and kept ballooning.
Now let’s take this a notch higher, some incredibly ignorant persons would always want to stop me on the road and say ‘Oh you are so fat now’ ‘Oh you have added so much weight’ ‘Ah, you are now darker’ etc BUT the worst for me was ‘Ha, you look sooooooo different’ and they would say it in such a way that they might have as well said ‘Gosh didn’t know you had it in you to be sooooo ugly Eziaha’
I can’t forget this day I had made the effort to look good, or as good as I could look, and then some chick in church sees me, squeezes her face and goes
‘Ah, you have added sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much weight…’
It took the TRINITY in me to not give her the comeback she deserved seeing as she had a bigger tummy than me, she was NOT pregnant and she was FATTER with fat arms, folds, love handles and all. Did I repeat that she WAS NOT PREGNANT and has NEVER BEEN???
I was so pissed my goodness.
And there were very many others. Some people would visit and go on and on about their sisters, cousins, colleagues, etc who were all ‘kim kardashian’ when preggers. Others would not forget to mention how it was IMPOSSIBLE to lose the weight and so many other stuff I don’t even want to mention here but still just as annoying and painful to hear. I was hormonal, so yes they were painful to hear. Someone actually called me UGLY once to my face. I cried!!!
And did I forget to mention the demographic of almost everyone who spewed out the wrong stuff
- Women
- Single
- Nulligravida (Never been pregnant)
The men were a lot more sympathetic.
I had to think back to my pre-preg days when I saw women who had added weight as a result of pregnancy. I don’t recall saying anything like that to them. Infact I certainly remember telling a certain someone who kept saying of one woman in a rather disgusted tone ‘She is now SO FAT’. I just kept telling the person not to think of mentioning such to the lady’s face ooo. Infact, I generally think saying that a lady is FAT is rude, pregnant or not. Except of course, you guys are padi padi…
Another exception when it comes to ‘all things fat’ that pregnancy brings, it is perfectly understandable for of course pregnant women to poke fun at themselves, a multigravida can poke fun at a pregnant woman too especially if she has been there, done that as per pregnancy weight and all. But it is these ones that are the most compassionate. And even when they yab, they do it in a compassionate way too especially when we are padi padi. But if you have never had a baby and you are not ‘tight’ with this ‘fat preggo’ SHUT UP!!! Trust me she most likely is dealing with it too. There were days I didn’t even want to come out.
Oh bless this chick called Onyinye.
The first time I appeared in DCC Lagos this year and after a long time away, I must admit that i actually felt comfortable despite my ballooning size.
The defence I had planned was to just yab myself before anyone yabs me but most of them were all like ‘oh don’t worry, you would lose it soon enough’. The hugs were reassuring and didn’t feel the least patronizing. Onyi went a step further and was like
‘…do you know so so and so, if you see her now ehn, she even got bigger than you but she has gone back to shape…’
She actually kept looking for her to show me. She was too reassuring. And yes, her baby had just turned one and though she was a hotter preggy than me, she made sure I got it into my head that I would lose it all again.
Oh and my bestie Valerie, oh my gosh!!! 
Everyone needs a friend like that. The most encouraging girl in the whole world. When she visited, she made sure she made me feel good about myself and now tell you how I am even hot compared to the ones she sees. Valerie would get you rolling with her questions. She would always have something encouraging to say. She even looked at my tummy and complimented the fact that I did not have stretch marks like that. Oh she was a joy to have around. I was so relaxed with her without feeling a need to apply makeup and stuff. She even went on a walk with me and sha advised me small small. Yup she is a FAB doctor and an INCREDIBLE bestie.
Oh and there was OLAEDO an amazing amazing GORGEOUS lady I met via this blog
Kept reassuring me that I would lose the weight and giving me tips… Awesome lady. See her lovely kids hehehe. They visited and loaded me with Oats knowing how much I love it and am trying to keep fit. And gifts for KingDaveed. (Lol Sorry Olaedo i had to put your business out there lol. Forgive hehehe)
Now back to the convo that inspired this. The man actually said he and his wife were said AMONG THEMSELVES that ‘pregnancy no fit Eziaha sha’ lol. It was the truth. That third trimester no fit me at all. But he and his wife, who is my padi and had been sweet all through my pregnancy, said it to themselves but it is only now when I am getting ‘beautiful again’ that he can now refer to it and laugh about it. Timings!!! Timing is everything. Save your snide remarks for later.
Same thing that would have hurt me then made me laugh now because my skin is back to normal, the tummy is going down and the baby fat is disappearing small small and E’ is getting fabulous again. 
Because let us face it, some women have those kinda genes that would aid them glide through pregnancy like a BOSS and still look hot and smokin’ with only the tummy protruding and then proceed to lose all the pregnancy weight as easily as ever. But some of us with the other kinda genes would add weight, get all puffy and BLACK and sweat for months and months before we lose it.
Don’t make it any harder for us. BE SENSITIVE!!! Thank you.
E’
PS:
Mehn, this weightloss business is serious.
Eating healthy, exercise, the works. Some days I am all hyped, some days like Sunday at TK’s dedication, I ate rice like it was going out of proportion. Sigh!!! 
Anyways, my mantra is still NO SMILING TILL KIMK BODY!!!
Happy to start getting the compliments again tho. Infact today as i stood by the road waiting for something, i actually got a toaster hehehe. Told him i had a baby inside lol
I recall when I used to hide behind people to snap right after i gave birth
Now i dey try sha but as I am still exclusive breastfeeding, there are limits to what i can do diet wise.
PPS
Of course pregnancy is such a gift. I certainly cannot discount it.
Just sharing my story to encourage others in my shoe and school others who dunno how-to and what to say… I will also share my Birth story soon. Na time…
Imagine, Yesterday i put up that picture feeling all hot and all with my ‘hips don’t lie’
and a friend actually said ‘Eziaha na you fat like this? This baby is making you FAT ooo’ I mean people were paying compliments and that was ALL she had to say??? Had to correct her immediately. Yup your guessed it- single and nulligravida.
Sigh!!!
PPPS:
HMM let me commit myself. I have this post I have been working on in my head. Tz a transcript of a message by PK… WHY AM I STILL SINGLE!!! Love it so I wanna share it. Transcribing a message is HARD WORK but this June, I am all fired up so let’s hope it is my next or max next two posts.
PPPPS:
Happy New month darlings. Bless!!!
Hottest! I’m proud of you. Your dedication to get back to figure 8 is nothing short of inspiring! Please carry go, I dey your back! When I see hot mums, I tap into it o! It isn’t easy I can tell you. My elder sister never quite got her body back till after baby no 4! Yep! I don’t know how she did it but after her last child, she managed to tame the bulge. I’m sha taking notes. Maybe in your blogposts, you can give snippets on what is working for you and what isn’t. More power to you cheri!
Interestingly my sis too. After her fourth. Now she don hot ehn.
Biko aint nobody got time for that.
By Nov 30 my wedding anniversary, I better be hotter than kimk hehehe
Muah my love
Comment more jor
And yea when I have gone some distance complete with discipline, I will share.
It seems very premature now but I sure will ultimately
Congratss once again on the birth of your sunshine and your weight loss journey,doing pretty well!!…Me I’m seriously looking for how to put on weight cos its really hard for me..All the best on your #NokimKBodyNoChills body goals!! xx
Hahahah
Pele love
The struggle is real even if different
Single. Nulligravida. I have no idea what to say to you concerning pregnancy weight and the loss of it so- sealed lips. You look good by the way. Have you tried doing planks though? Awesomest exercise ever thought up.
However, so often (I’m usually very quiet), people have sometimes been extremely bitchy to me and I came through that. Here’s my secret- DO NOT RESPOND! Just stare. I can remember staring at one particular human being for such a long time- they apologised and walked away by themselves. It’s a matter of picking who you choose to respond to. As Tyler Perry says- People are gonna talk about you. Let them talk. It’s not what they call you- it’s what you respond to.
By the way, how is KingDaveed?
Hahaha
I love d staring approach…
Thanks plenty nne even tho in ds case, tz not exactly gossip or lies, tz the temp truth u would rather they passed.
I must say tho, my next pregnancy, il be more fortified.
Thanks again. KingDaveed is amazeballs. He’s asleep
It wasn’t gossip I was referring to. I don’t wear makeup other than lipstick so some days someone would come and hassle me about that. I wear braces so someone who knew better would ask if I got them so I wouldn’t eat too much etc
But like I said, shake it off, do the pointed stare and be yourself. Trust me, the people who care about you- they’ll never let you go. Ignore the rest. There are certain circumstances I’ve been exposed to in the course of my life that have very concretely taught me this lesson. The people who care- they’ll still care no matter how bad you feel about yourself. They’ll even make you feel better. Do whatever you want to because of yourself. To feel healthier. More beautiful. Not to silence anyone. Nothing draws people faster than innate satisfaction with yourself at every stage.
Give baby a kiss.
‘NOT to silence anyone’
Toooooooo true.
Thanks darling
Loooool at braces and food.
Anyways i guess if some people knew better, they would act better
I loooove this post!!! Lol…I get the opposite side of the mean comments. Saying someone is too thin especially when your not offering any sort of solution is devilish.. But along the line I’ve realized life is too precious to live on people’s remarks. E still dey pain sometimes sha ?
I’m with you on #NoSmilingTillKimKBody…from the other end..lol.
Your Beautiful jare….KingDaveed I see your peace sign ??
Exactly. No form of solution or encouragement. Ugh.
And yup e dey pain sometimes hehehehe
Congragulations Eziaha.. and you look beautiful!..
Thank you darling
me from the first day i got pregnant with my first i started to look ugly.as in really ugly.and it didnt go away after i gave birth o.me dat used to be fine chic,even won face of my class in final year,now mama ugly and fat.one day i saw a former classmate and was smiling so brightly.she was just looking like who is this person i dont know smiling at me.she now said u look familiar.she honestly didnt recognise me.this happened more than a million times with more than a billion people.my hubbys friends who maybe where envying him on our wedding day now looking at me like haaaaa.
the good side of the story, AM BEAUTIFUL AGAIN! maybe not as fine as b4 2 babiesbut am getting my confidence back n i feel great.
pretty E u will def get the kimk body again
Oh no you are beautiful vivian. Anyways didn’t know you before pregnancy but the Vivian I know is gorgeous abeg.
But your story made me laugh ehn. Esp the hubby’s friends hahahahaha
Oh and that classmate thing, I got that too. One day at ANC I was smiling at her and she was like WHAT!??. Kai I felt bad ehn.
But the good thing is I have this neighbour who only met me when I was about to pop. Then about 2months post partum, she couldn’t recognise me. She said I didn’t look anything like the preggo she met.
Need I mention how happy it made me?
Hmmm ije nwa… we thank God for everything jare
Kisses to your babies
thanks for the compliment…lol
E!! Lolz, every pregnant woman has a story to tell, mine was different, I was HOT all through pregnancy, with body in shape and fit, but immediately baby came out, I was still intact, but the moment I started lactating?? Boom! I blew up to the point that I became scared. Doing exclusive BF so I couldn’t diet like I could. But now, baby takes semi-solids, and I have cut down my consumption rate, I am getting back too my size 8 again.
Truth is, all those “eewing” and “awwing” at you, will still say ” na you be this”? How did you do it?? So my dear, enjoy oh. Regards to KingDavid and Le hubs.
Hahahaha
I think olaedo also told me she adds weight when breastfeeding.
Gosh that is just crazy!!!
But we will get our hotness back jor. Let’s just be patient with ourselves and then sometimes take our eyes off our bods and gaze at that precious baby…
You’re right about my adding weight while nursing my babies. High prolactin levels, I know, but really annoying considering that it’s not that way when I’m preggie.
When I look at those 3 babies, though, I know it’s all worth it, jare… can’t even imagine my life without them, less than perfect body or not.
After Kene, It is harder getting back to being all hot and sexy and I’ll be the first to admit that there are days that gets to me. However, I know that can work the fat off and get my body all toned again. Been there done that, so…
You’re doing the right things and KimK will load in good time. Even if it takes longer than you plan, it will happen.
Don’t get me started on those ‘jirikwa nwayo’ people… Water off a duck’s back, jare… even if the duck is seething quietly, lol.
P.S. You’re forgiven for putting our business out there :p lol.
It was my pleasure, darling.
Beginning to love your write up. Thanks this is so encouraging. And to think I did not Lik u so much bak in skol, no offense, just did not know you. Keep it up!
Loooooooiol
Not sure who this is but no offence taken hun.
Thanks
E just keep in the work and dieting, by the wedding anniversary you would be hotter than Kim K. It is not easy, Nigerians can be rude sha. When they start of like that telling me ‘you are getting fat o’, I tell them my husband likes it like that. Good to read your write-ups. Say hello to King Daveed.
Amen. Thanks hunnay
I am here now yaaaaaaaaay lol
Thanks love and amen
Congrats E’… miss u plenty ooO. May God continue to strengthen & Keep You & Baby. Amen.
I am here now yaaaaaaaaay lol
Thanks love and amen
hmmm…E dearie, i always enjoy reading ur msgs sincerellllyyyyyyy….and i must say i love the skin glow; motherhood rili luks gud on u…..big huggggg
Thanks dear
Awesome awesome post. It’s taken me almost 4yrs…even though I wasn’t really working off the fat at the initial stage but I had to learn 1st that regardless of what people see on the outside, I have to know for myself that I am beautiful and I don’t have to be skinny to be beautiful but I only need the skinny to stay healthy and love longer so I am doing it for that major reason. The minor reason, my Pastor said once that the way her hubby held her was different when she lost weight…I want to experience it myself! Lol!!!!
I need to come and spoil some of these ur weight loss plans with amala, ewedu and ogunfe! Just kidding. Keep going strong.
lol at what ur pastor said. i need to experience it too
Vivian shift please lol
Hahaha. Been spoiling myself with amala sef. E beter pass garri.
Me sha while I agree that I don’t have to be kimk before I am beautiful, I will not let myself go biko. I want to look at me and like what I see because I can do it.
Yes we can!!!
Lol at minor reason. I recall that message and how she said it sef with the hmmmmmm lol
Fab Mum E’ … you were fab all through dear.
I too do loosed my Preggie glow 8 months to get it back few days before delivery.
Yeaaa Nne, some people don’t really know when to save their comments.
I meet one woman (didn’t really knew her) in a neighborhood store, two months post delivery.
Woman: Is this not Auntie P sister ?.
Shop Owner: Yes…… !
Woman: Why is she this FAAAAAAAT ! ?
*The most stupid question in life that doesn’t deserve an answer (my classification), but the S.O answered*
Shop Owner: Oh you don’t know ! she just put to bed…….
Woman: Put to bed my foot ! (hit her feet on the floor) she gave gave birth to ‘just’ one baby and this fat, what happened….
At this point, I dashed out of the shop with load of tear-filled eyes (without buying all…), busted into cry as I enter my flat. Almost cried my eyeball out that day.
Thanks for consolation from my hubbie ‘He likes the way I am and all….’
Till today I didn’t bother to know who the woman ‘was’. As if they sent her to spite me !. MTcheeeeew ! ! ! !
Had another experience during preggie (‘l mail you), but for our ears only hehehe.
Motherhood Rocks Forever, loosing that hour glass figure for it is a JUST course, but I trust you, with your determination SURE you will get yours back !.
You are looking glamorous already.
Give tickling Kisses to KingDaveed on my behalf.
Ugh!!!! U didn’t bite her.
Gosh!!! Ugh. Look I need smart comebacks to comments like this that pass the message and don’t hurt my faith.
This is WRONG on all levels. Wicked sef…
Ugg
Ngwa waiting for the mail boo hehehehe
My mailbox has cucu been buzzing as a result of this post n I am in d mood lol
We plenty jare
*Motherhood Rocks Forever, loosing that hour glass figure for it, is loosing it for a JUST Cause,……
Don’t worry hun.
We get it
Nice post Ezi….hugs..
Thanks dear
Welcome back, mama. You look good. Baby’s tall and healthy. daddy is happy and proud. All is well with the world. Idiots on the side can fill their bellies with their foolish negative words- help reduce hunger in the world. Dogs might have opinions but they will never be world leaders. I’m outta here.
Nnedimma don vex
I pity who cross your path.
But you are gorgeous so they won’t hehe
Lol. It’s all love, bae.(Ugh! That word.) And I have gist for you. I will call or hit you up on bbm. And thanks for the compliment. I hope my hormones will keep it in mind.
Looool. They will. Just take a long look at your gorgeous mama hehehehe
Ngwa waiting bae… :p
*rotfl* Well said!
Hmmmm…this is deep. I don’t have a child yet but I have had my share if this negative statements. It hurts me so much when friends or relatives that hasn’t seen me for years start telling me am so fat. I was chatting with someone and we haven’t exchanged two complete sentence and she was telling me I looked so fat. This has happened so many times. It hurts me deeply. I cry always especially after hearing this and I add my desire to lose weight as part of my prayer points. They don’t know my struggle and how I try to keep fit. They don’t know if one has any medical issues that made them so fat. I wish this post could be made available to larger audience and many Nigerians could read this. You look so beautiful and fit in this short time. Am so proud of u mama. KingDaveed this your peace sign is so cute.
My dear biko don’t let them get to you.
Do your best. Stay fit. But on this journey, love yourself
I sincerely dunno what to say o cos I rarely have weight issue(with adding that is) buh the weight loss business is a serious something o. We’ll done mama! The last pic though… those hips don’t lie at all. You look gorgeous… I love the smile. btw I love the sport shoes mehn! The color and the combo is jes cute. Kisses
Thanks hun
I still find it hard to understand why some Pple are so insensitive to preggy women esp d female gender, I mean one will have expected them to be more understanding. Not everyone is lucky to Ve the glow all through pregnancy. As a matter of fact statistics reveal those who add weight and generally bloat during pregnancy is even more than those who don’t experience such changes. Am glad you had around you those who worked at making you feel comfy. In my books , you were beautiful before pregnancy, beautiful all through pregnancy and still beautiful post pregnancy. Love dem hips tho, if only you cld keep them and loose weight on oda parts as u exercise hehehe
P.s
Remember Remilekun? She has put to bed, will give you details privately
Praaaaaise the Lord!!!
Devu ntoi!!!
Btw muah… Thank you soooo much Susy
Can I call him KingD……….
You hips be telling the truth in those pants. EOD
Back to the matter
Lets stretch this weight thing to beyond just pregnancy
Its easy for people to be hurt by words such as ‘you are so fat’ but the same people in the past and in the present made statements to others such as ‘you are so thin..do you EAT at all’ then they would gather accomplices to do mini meeting right there in front of you to gather and discuss your matter. If I say what Ive heard hmmm
SInce women are the main culprits and victims can we all be more sensitive to both sides we dont know their struggles either.
Thank you so much.
Too true. We need to be more sensitive everyway
Hugs
E’
Btw KingD? Your call hehehehe
I just love his full name jare
All these weight gaining comments from people all points to the fact that people need to learn to say the right thing at the right time… That you are saying what you see doesn’t guarantee a right to say it… I’ve really gotten some terribly annoying comments from people.. ‘bimbo, why are you this skinny??? It’s not everything one should talk about.. If its not nice, abegi moveee… I love the first picture mama… You are getting there. You have the same preggy gene With my mum and she sheds the weight fast. Hers was even worst with terrible pimpuse.. Regards to his royal highness
Biko amen ooo
Can’t wait to lose at all
And yup I agree. The ‘guarantee a right to say it…’
I often don’t know what to comment on your posts but I do enjoy them whenever I get to read.
You look gorgeous pre, during and post-preg. Your hips truly don’t lie. This post makes me look forward to getting pregnant (after marriage of course, lol) Your son is sooooo cute! And has a Royal name!
Nigerians especially we ladies really need to season our comments on people’s looks with salt. And if what we gotta say can’t come out right, just swallow it.
Thank you ooo
Lol
Thanks for the blog love and compliment.
And thanks for finally commenting hehehe
I’m speechless…this post resonates deeply. By the way I love your determination. It will end in praise.
Thank you so much Tope
I was reading your posts from way back and read sth about ghost readers and the punishment it will attract.So i will try and be commenting sha. Am Single and nulligravida{thanks for d new vocab},but its not an excuse to be insensitive.And pls while at the #tillkimkbody dont lose those hips o.
P.S. Incase u hear an unfamiliar face and voice shout E’ know its a FAB blog reader{i really do hope we meet}.And lol @ every girl’s dream, so true for me.
hahahahahaha
shout indeed. lol. just walk up and say hiiiii. i don’t bite, at least not all the time. hehehe.
I should resume threats again na.
thanks for the blog love boo
Aww! Terrific blog, terrific personality
Taurusianfeminist.wordpress.com
Thanks hun