EZIAHA

Like most of you know, I am the most ‘in-love-with-my-girlfriends’ person on earth…

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I love me my girlfriends yo and I don’t care what you think about this line… hehehe.

‘…There are “friends” who destroy each other, unreliable friends, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother…’ Proverbs 10:25

Thankfully, I have those kinda ‘sticks-closer-than-a-brother’ friends.

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I won’t lie, I have been super blessed with the world’s most amazing friends!!! Female friends of course. I don’t even think I have up to 3 male friends hehehe. Not complaining tho… Girls over guys anyday (minus the boo of course)

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I think it is because I show myself friendly and God just helps me too. Plus, I don’t have so many anyways. I just go on and on about the ones I have that one may begin to think I have a billion.

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Plus I am a friendly, easy-to-love, huggie girl, loveable (yes I know i mentioned before), sweet, fabulous girl, so I think that makes it easy for people to call me friend or bestie or sister. Some even go a step further to yab me…

YABIS ALERT… You see that Tani girl? She said I should leave Sapphire alone to spend quality time with her husband and stop visiting her… hehehe. Just one teeny visit I did ooo. Anyways, trust my girl Sapphire to finish Tani (Yes Tani, she finished you. I just didn’t want to let you know hehehehe)

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Anyhoos, deal is, girlfriends rock…

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(including you Tani, with all your wahala)

I truly believe that one of life’s best gifts has to be the gift of friendship. We should indeed trust God for great friends as we go through life.

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I am sure some of you think I must be so blessed to have such amazing friends and that everyone around me is an angel…

iLaugh… BIG MIGHTY NO!!!

I have just learnt to ignore such people. Maybe not completely because that class of ‘friends’ have inspired this.

I have a couple of people around me who GOD FORBID they say anything good or nice or complimentary about you. But when you make a mistake, they are the FIRST to jump at you in correction and sometimes, a sort of ‘ehen-you-are-not-so-perfect-afterall’ kinda way.

Forgive me, but I don’t understand such people. I have some of them. They are usually the FIRST to point out my mistakes but I have hardly gotten as much as a compliment from them on anything at all.

Not that I am shopping for compliments of course, but I seriously would be the LAST to always and continually find the faults in people and when I think they have done a commendable job at anything, they go into limbo DEAF AND DUMB mode.

And I do not mean this for only serious tasks maybe at work and in a boss-worker styled relationship. No. I mean that even for the most mundane things…

Because for me, it is these small things that reveal the character of people…

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It would kill them to pay you a compliment on your hair or dress, but the day you are having a bad hair or dress day, they are the first to point it out and gleefully too.

They read your blog and the only time they say a word is when they wanna point out a typo (in a very derogatory manner) or they just wanna tackle you based on a point that you have made that they think is wrong and therefore don’t agree with you.

The kind who would never ever say ‘well done’ or congrats to you when you aced a tough test or exam, but are the first to tell you (and then go a step further to spread the gist) when you have performed below par…

The kind that would never say a CONGRATS or HAPPY BIRTHDAY or HAPPY MARRIED LIFE to your friend whose picture you have changed and changed on BBM on her special day but is quick to ping you only to complain about the person’s makeup or choice of colors or her gown…

I have a couple of people like that and it saddens me that people can be all that.

See eh, I won’t deceive you. Most times, I have opinions on stuff that people do, but just because I have an opinion doesn’t mean I should spew it out of my mouth if it doesn’t taste nice. I can do that with some of my close friends. I can yab their makeup, their hair, their work, etc and all that because I know that my compliments credit is good with them. I might even do that with some other random persons provided I have paid them really good compliments in the past and so my account ain’t in the red or dormant sef.

This is my opinion that has come from experience. Take it or leave it but for me, this is one kind of person NOT to FRIEND… and also, most importantly, NOT TO BE…

IMO, people like this are either jealous, evil or both, all from the root cause of LOW SELF ESTEEM…

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The sort of “…‘friends’ who destroy others…”

I speak to them but when they start, I absolutely ignore them. No way such a ‘friend’ is making inner circle.

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No need wasting precious time with such friends this weekend… BE WISE…

Have a fabulous weekend, colored with true and healthy friendships…

E’

33 Responses

  1. E’, I wish I could talk, talk and talk like you, eh!

    So after reading this post, I now know that it is not good for my health and my emotions to befriend guys who are slow to give good compliment but fast to condemn. Thank you for this inspiration.

    But is it because I dont have close friends? I’ve never witnessed this kind of people in my life; infact I dont even have friends to clap for me when I do things that make little sense not to talk of those that will ‘yab’ me in times of imperfection.

    So, now I won’t even bother taking steps of having friends, this way I won’t fall victim of this kind of friends that should never be befriended. God bless us.

    John 3:16
    JM

  2. Spoken well and in detail. I dnt hv so many ‘Friends’ bt I am daily thankful for the ones I have. Thank u E fOr d lovely post …nd most importantly for me d most dearest of friends anyone cld hope or ask for.

  3. Nne,really such friends,jst gets me weak and tired,I totally agree on not wasting time with such friends,unfriend sharply#straightface# but thank God Fø̲̣̣я̅ our girl friends,who are positive and see the best in us.

    1. Warrens love, I can only imagine the kind of plenty bad comments u may have got from the ‘moi frnds nd dia boos’ pis series u did… Some pple are just EVIL! Haba! Every sentence they make must have a bad word.

      1. Hahaha
        Loved the series ruth did.
        Welcome to the fab world of commenters Darling
        Let’s get more comments from you before we give you the first timers package
        Muah
        E’

  4. My dia!I kno those kind of frnds,dat u comment lovely hair n outfit to a girl ur acquitance n dey say,wat did she wear sef,see her legs ,hairy!kai!
    Or valerie see hw u r addin weight u r beginnin to look lyk a buffalo,den dey punctuate it by laffin like a hyena!
    All such friends my comment is thus!Run away frm them o!m quick to desist frm dem!
    One more b4 I forget this ones,friends that keep askin if u v broken up wit ur boo?lols!I dnt get that one @ all!d line is”hw z kamoru,hope u guys r nt fightin o?,”biko y shld I fight wit him?y shld dat b d questn !or hope he z thinkin abt u?
    God has helped me for my choice of friends I v few!I pick my friends o!Eziaha I pickd u!u were opposite my rm remember!hw com twas only u I was frnds wit n nt d other girls in ur rm!I personally pick friends o!n if thr a friend dat sticketh closer than a broda!na Eziaha o!she sabi well,Titilayo,mon bijou(my sistergmy jewel)God try well well for givin her to me!dat blood z sure thicker dan water!

    1. Valerie oooooo
      Loooooool
      I know someone who asks that question on break up too.
      And she is usually surprised that “they are still together? ???” Kai. People of the world.
      Oh and the annoying one on weight. The greeting is always “you look sick” or “see how fat you are” although in all fairness most girls talk a lot about weight when we see. Just that some people just dunno how to make their points without being offensive.
      Kai. I don laff taya.
      Yesoooooo. It was b71 and b73 if I recall.
      And yup our darling titilayomi.
      Thank God for great friendship o jare.
      Much love my Angel o’ love
      E’

    1. Like I heard my boss say Thursday to a staff, luscious kisses.
      And she made this amazing luscious kisses sound. Hehehe.
      Yup my school is coooooooool like that…
      So luscious kisses love.
      And yup people, my girl’s blog is live at http://www.ibilivinfiction.wordpress.com
      The story up there was the major reason I felt she should start her fiction blog.
      Pls keep it buzzing oooo.
      Muah
      E’

  5. Soooo why are you still allowing them into your inner sanctum? Me, I’m moving forward and the bible advises me to shed every weight holding me back. I don’t like emotional drama nor do I like mind games. I don’t need a group of friends; give me 1 or 2 loyal ones and I’m good to go!

    1. Allowing into inner sanctum ke??? Huh???
      They are in the outer outer courts. My inner sanctum has the real ones. I’m just saying this about these other ones who I have to talk to anyways but have to be careful at keeping them where they belong no matter what…

  6. Chai Nne, I’ve been awol 4a while *covering ma eyes* e ma binu. Bt I promise tiz 4legit reasons. Dis ur post cldnt hv come @a beta time o, I’ve already started ctrl + alt + del no time 4bad belle friends biko. Life is 2 important & precious 2hv such negativity around ur personal space. It aint worth it joor.

    1. As the baby mama of my baby Ariel, I forgive you.
      I agree with you jare.
      Ctrl alt delete biko.
      Welcome back. This blog missed you plenty.
      E’

  7. Nice post eziaha, I think I have had my share of bad friends in the past, it made me wiser anyway. I maintain a very healthy ‘distant friendships’ with a lot of people which I believe is good for me, I have very few close one’s that I can trust today because I have done my research on them well. Women generaly have issues, jealousy, gossip, back stabbing, beef… I don’t believe God made us that way cos we are not all like that, so you are what you make yourself to become. (Men have this issues too but its common with women). For heaven’s sake how can somone be waiting for your mistake/downfall??? If you derive pleasure in things like this, u r d very definition of ‘EVIL’ .And for the friends that might have hurt you in the past, forgive them,learn from the experience, keep them @ arms length. And believe me, you don’t have to be friends with the whole world.

    1. Yup yup you don’t have to be friends with the whole world.
      But because we have to live peaceably with all, distant friendship is the way forward.
      Thanks darling.
      Muah
      E’

  8. “I can yab their makeup, their hair, their work, etc and all that because I know that my compliments credit is good with them”. I totally agree with this. Some friends are only happy to pay u a compliment when it is intended to pull u down. The only thing that qualifies anybody to yab someone else is if they hv paid enough compliments in the past. Nice one E!

  9. My roomate at a time(sad to say) was like this..she is an amazing person if I may say so myself, but only to others… I noticed a pattern of “why is your dress like this,or make up like this” with her and never any “you look good”..
    I don’t fish for comments but i’d prefer you keep the negative to yourself esp when you’ve never said anything positive…
    Wondered for a bit why she was like that and I just let it go..

    I always praise my bestie for this trait, she is secure enough to praise(not flatter) any girl to the moon and back.it takes a confident woman to do thatm

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