Just as I typed Yesterday’s post on Mommyhood, I got a message at past 11pm from someone who wants to join my Squad. Not an email ooo but a Whatsapp message at past 11pm? Nothing urgent btw. And all I kept hearing was BOUNDARIES… People generally would cross every boundary available until you define it for them, and then go a step further to make sure they LEARN not to cross it.

When I started coaching, I had NO boundaries. 2am, 2pm, 8am, 7pm, 5am , if I am awake, I am coaching, answering questions, etc. totally time consuming. YES passion is good but passion without knowledge is stupidity…

Infact, the way i heard Chris talk about the things we need to add to our PASSION ehn, phew…

Then one day, God used Bunmi of Shredder Gang to cucu give me common sense lol. From then, I put a COACHING TIME STRUCTURE in place and for the most part, I stick to it. I come in between 6 and 7 up until 9am, and I encourage you to ask all the questions you wanna ask then ooo, because if you are screaming CoachE’ at 11 or noon, I don’t even open chat. If you ask me personally and I know you are on Naija time zone, I wait till my coaching hours to answer you. If I don’t guard my set boundaries, I won’t have time to do anything else but coach. With that in place, kai, life became sweeter and 100% more efficient. Definitely wisdom for growing business owners.

Ditto even in regular conversations, I try to balance out my life. If I am working and someone is trying to gist with me on Whatsapp, you can see that I am ONLINE ooo (no need to set my online presence to hidden and remove the BLUE color Whatsapp gives when a chat has been read lol) but I won’t respond until it is time for me to take a break. I actually have respect for myself and my time so it is not even about the other person. I will ultimately get to you/it but I try to have undivided focus. I love technology with all its boundless opportunities but I refuse to be a slave to it. If I am being distracted by it, I don’t blame it, or the ‘distractor’ lol, I blame me.
The crazy part is when someone is trying to start up a conversation at 11pm and is actually demanding an answer. Haba!! Please let’s learn to respect people’s privacy and space. There are just some basic communication rules. If it is not urgent for example, leave conversations to regular office hours or max 7pm especially if you guys are not bud-buddies. And because I find myself holding various kinds of Whatsapp meetings, it means my number spreads. Gosh, you need to see messages that are NOT urgent coming in and demanding answers at midnight. Not cool guys.
Same thing with phone calls. I am amazed when I see calls at 9pm, 10pm from maybe someone doing a job for me. I reject it, then in the morning, I ring them and warn them not to do that again. Happened recently with my photographer. To ask me a question that could very well wait till morning, he rang at 10pm. Ah!!! I had to tell him off the next day, politely too. Or phonecalls coming in at 7am lol. One chick I wanted to make me up for something did that to me. Had to also set her straight. Nothing was urgent enough to call at 7am biko… It wasn’t even 7am yet.
Now don’t get me wrong ooo. Sometimes some things require immediate attention, and we oblige but for the most times, people just pick up their phone and start to call or Whatsapp without looking at the time. NOT GOOD AT ALL!!! I mean there are some platforms you can communicate via at all times eg email, but for phone calls, Whatsapp and sometimes text, respect peoples time and boundaries if not urgent.
But like I said, even if people don’t know to respect your boundaries, TEACH AND TRAIN them to by your response. They may think you are being proud and all at first but soon, they will come to respect you for your principles and even help you stick to them. Then they too learn how to put boundaries in their own lives too because they watched you do same.
I hope this helps someone… Your time is your life so

6 Responses

    1. I agree totally.
      Amazes me so I’m pretty much determined to make sure no one stays crossing mine

  1. So True E boundaries are so important.I believe in Principes alot because you really have to set boundaries and have principles to show what you stand for .like the scriptures says in all thy getting get understanding,alot of people have to really get understanding in the area of understanding people’s boundaries

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