#PreggE’series… Between the Old cow and the Old wives’

Location: ObGyn’s Office

Doctor: Mrs Olojo, today you have to take your tetanus injection

Me: Oh really? Where? Hope not on my bumbum ooo (injection on the bumbum can paaaaaaaain) cos I will soooo cry

Doctor: No. on the left arm. But this one you are scared of injection, you do know labour is painful right?

Me: *SMILES* (inwardly making mental notes of the billion and one questions I wanna ask when I am back to his office)

PAUSE!!!

In my last #PreggE’series post, I raved about how I loved my ObGyn and how he is a faith man and all. I still love him. But you see, a doctor’s gotta do/say what a doctor’s gotta say/do. Now what’s a girl like E’ to do?

Yup!!!

You should have as much sense as an old cow… EAT THE HAY AND SPIT OUT THE STICKS!!!

Phew, the amount of information both solicited and unsolicited a pregnant woman has to deal with is an incredible lot. If you are in faith for a supernatural pregnancy and birth experience like I am, you would have to be REALLLYYYY WISE. Don’t be ignorant but Sieve the information you get.

I did say I was going to ask him more questions abi? Someone may be wondering, why scare yourself even further by asking this man more questions about the labour that he says is painful?

Good question.

You know why?

I am all for information gathering. I WANT TO KNOW ALL THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT THIS PROCESS I AM CURRENTLY UNDERGOING!!!

Then like the old cow, I spit out the rubbishes (and dem plenty)

But there is a catch…

Col 3:16

Let the Word of God dwell in you RICHLY…

RICHLY being the operational word…

You see ehn, I have built my faith. I have and am still labouring in the Word and all it says about childbirth. My first reaction to what my ObGyn said was a smile… Cos immediately that statement jammed faith in me the moment I heard it and I remembered the Word

1 Tim 2:15

…Notwithstanding (any doctor’s report) she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety…

Saved there translates ‘kept safe and sound’

That don’t sound like pain doctor…

🙂

But I didn’t tell him. Instead when I returned to the office after the tetanus shot, which was very painful by the way, I started shooting my questions.

Ehen, what is labour REALLY ? When does it start? How long does it last for typically? At what point does natural delivery become a problem for the woman that we need to switch to CS? (Btw, you can’t mention CS even in passing where my mom is. She will be all over you like a blood hound) and so on…

Lemme not bore you with all his answers but the one that interested me was when he said that labour for first time moms last typically for 6hours or so (something in that range)

OK!!!

Now my confession says one hour max and the bible says in  Exodus 1:19 that the Hebrew women were string and vigorous and they had their babies QUICKLY AND SHARPLY UNLIKE the Egyptian women so therefore, I fired more questions… (my ObGyn is a dream… patient and sweet)

I was going somewhere.

Me: Ehen but for some women, I hear labour lasts for under an hour. Is that true?

ObGyn: Yes, for a FEW women.

Then he proceeds to tell me a story of a Fulani woman who had her baby in NO TIME. He had to take delivery of that baby in the car. Apparently, she had been having contractions and SHE DID NOT KNOW meaning she felt absolutely NO PAIN!!!

Phew… Not what we always hear BUT  that was what I needed to hear!!!

Like an old cow, I chewed that hay and spat out the sticks quickly…

The Doctor had given me a REAL TIME testimony.

Like I said, my confessions started early. I haven’t had a baby before ooo but you can’t get me to believe anything less than the Word and promises concerning my pregnancy.

I recall a close friend telling me how she had a VERY TRAUMATIC first pregnancy and delivery which eventually ended in CS and so for the second, she opted for CS deliberately sef. No time to push. And she regaled me with all the TERRIBLY TERRIFYING HORRIFYING experiences of first births, both hers and her friends but poooooooooof, I didn’t even shake once. I didn’t argue with her, I just kept smiling all through what she was saying and spitting out all the sticks, the only hay being a healthy mother and baby walked out of the hospital. Faith in me was brandishing its two edged sword, cutting down any fear that attempted to enter…

No need countering her story. I was just happy she had her babies finally and they are doing very well now.

of course, i don’t have anything against CS and those who opt for it deliberately (i forget the medical term now) but achoro m

And my goodness, BIRTHING videos!!! Ah!!! You know all those scenes we see in the movies when a woman is having a baby? Ah very scary sometin ooo. While I believe it won’t be bad for me. I opted out of watching birthing videos till one day the hubs asked me if I saw the feature video from Baby Centre on the daily emails they send us and I am like nope but since he watched it, I said lemme go and see.

I wouldn’t call it a terrible experience because the woman was just amazing through it all. There were points where she was so uncomfy and in plenty pain but she was a STRONG BLACK WOMAN and then after 4hours plus, baby’s head turned up, and we had a happy mom and crying baby. The video had the potential of making one scared sha (especially when they CHUKKED one LONG TIN inside her vagina and broke her water which had hubs freaking out lol) but when I saw it, I was just thrilled at when the head turned up and how the baby was removed from her. The previous drama didn’t faze me arrrraaaaallll

If you wanna see the video, enjoy. I recommend it for only the ‘old cows’ sha…

http://www.babycenter.com/2_live-birth-natural_3656508.bc

Anyways, having seen one video, I decided to see another one. It sorta just appeared when I was on YouTube looking for something else so I am like ‘ok let’s see this’

Oh my!!! It was BEAUTIFUL to watch. This woman, a white woman this time had her baby in a  birthing centre and she had her baby standing up!!! The midwife guided her through this ‘squat and stand’ exercise routine and then as she squatted and PUSHED real hard, baby’s head showed, with PLENTY WATER and practically no blood. I had read this ‘no blood’ thing on Dr N’s post on her supernatural childbirth but I wondered how possible it was. Phew… this woman had her baby in just a little over an hour. i downloaded the video and I can’t tell you how many times I have watched that baby’s head come out of her and how from her standing position, she reached out her hand to take the baby from the nurses IMMEDIATELY he dropped. Of course the nurses hand never left the baby’s head incase she mistakenly falls biko and another one kept supporting her from behind but that woman was BRILLIANT to watch. Everything in that delivery seemed like HAY mehn… Not to forget the beautiful pictures she kept posing for with her baby and her HUGE smile. She was sooo pretty she looked like Kim K.

Here is the video if you wanna see it. I recommend this for EVERYONE 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OtVSucX7OY

I mean, why don’t I believe I can have mine as easy as this woman? Why would I want to believe that it has to be an almost dying experience? Like Jackie says in her book SUPERNATURAL CHILDBIRTH, Children are a blessing… they can start off being a blessing from pregnancy right up to delivery and after birth as they grow.

The things I hear…??? incredible. Thank God for faith ooo. My dears, pregnant or not, just have as much sense as an old cow, spit out the sticks abeg…

I am always online googling this and that about pregnancy ooo cos I want to be well informed so I know how to be firing my faith. But like I said, I make sure that the Word is dwelling in me richly such that what I am seeing doesn’t put the spirit of fear in me. Be sure that before you go about gathering info/news IF YOU HAVE TO, you are overdosed on the Word first.

Moving from the old cow’s sense to the old wives’ tales

Now one of the outward signs on your belly when you are pregnant is called the ‘linea nigra’ which translates to a ‘dark line’. The linea nigra is that vertical line on your belly, a pregnancy trademark that shows up on a good number of moms-to-be of all stripes. It runs from your lower abdomen to your navel and sometimes beyond.

Now the old wives’ tale is a widely held traditional belief that is now thought to be unscientific or incorrect. In the case of pregnancy, they are signs that can help you predict you are having a boy or a girl using some signs. I find the old wives’ tales particularly hilarious so I am always reading them and trying them out.

One of my favourite has to be that if you are not blooming in pregnancy, you are carrying a girl so she is stealing all your shine. Choi!!! So any one who is blooming seriously is having a boy cos no competition. Hilarious!!!

Then if you dream you are having a boy, you are having a girl and if you dream that you are having a girl, go BLUE baby!!!

Then if the baby daddy gains weight, you are having a girl, if not, a boy. Lol.

Then if you are carrying all out in front, tz a boy. If your are carrying to the side too, tz a girl. I kinda believe this one sha. Choi!!! See what old wives’ have turned me into. Hehehe.

The silliest has to be that if you tie your wedding ring to some thread, hang it over your stomach and it swings from side to side, you are carrying a girl and if it goes around in circles, it is a boy…

 

 

Loooooooooool, Seriously, of course I can make my ring go in any direction. It doesn’t just go on its own. But I am always trying it sha. And as you can imagine, this second it swings right to left and the next it goes in circles. That thing is just time wasting and predicts nothing. But I find it fun to read and play.

Ok back to the linea nigra, that’s how yesterday night ooo, I got an email that mentioned linea nigra so I am like lemme even check and see if I even have it and WHAM I see it. It was sooooo cool. Actually it has no effect on the baby tz just a line that has always been there but at your skin color but pregnancy hormones make it darker and visible. I was excited. So I decided to see what the old wives had to say about the linea nigra. Choi!!!

The old wives tale is this – if you get a línea nigra and it runs from your pubic area to your belly button only, it’s a girl, and if it goes all the way up from your pubic area to the bottom-most part of you rib cage, then it’s a boy.

Anybody wanna know where my own stops? Looooooool. Not telling. Since I believe the old wives’ on this one.

But looking at this picture of mine and the mini cutie baby bump I am sporting, I wonder what the old wives’ have to say about err, other bumps… hehehe. I shared this picture on my mentee group and on my FAB group and tz my bumbum people were seeing. Imagine!!! Dee i still owe you the knock ooo.

So over to the old wives’, what does this mean? Boy, Girl or Twins?

For more old wives’ tales, click http://www.babycentre.co.uk/a550468/can-old-wives-tales-predict-a-boy-or-girl#ixzz3ERQK1dKR

And this http://www.bellybelly.com.au/pregnancy/old-wives-tales-boy-or-girl#.VCWbqWddVyw

Like I said, tz all fun.

But seriously, isn’t it just easier to do a gender scan?

Before these old wives’ make someone go all pink and wham you have boy so you are forced to wear him girl cloths. And there is no one to sue since we don’t know these old wives’ and where they live hehehe.

Of course I will be doing a gender scan to be sure but if I go with the old wives’ tale, well I am having a …..

See ya next time darlings…

Have a FAB weekend

Muah

E’

 

PS

Have you heard of FEAR.LESS

and the #RedLipstickChallange?

AS IN SERIOUSLY?

Oya click on this link sharply. Not too late to join in and also attend the program. this Sunday 4pm at DCC Lagos. Ladies only please. All the details are on the link.

I dare you!

PPS:

My BBM crashed. So people need to stop accusing me that I deleted them. Just find a good way to send me your pin again.

PPPS:

My linea nigra runs way beyond my navel up to my ribs… Hello BLUE hehehe.