You know, I have been thinking of something recently… so I decided I would blog about it.

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A lot of people talk to me about stuff. I think I am that kinda person that one can easily talk to so even complete strangers usually confide in me, friends too. Truth is sometimes, I truly do not know what to say to them, after I have prayed with and for them of course.


So what I always do is refer them to someone else who is wiser than me. In most instances, I say talk to your Pastor or leader and sometimes I go ahead to book an appointment with my Pastor for them. In some instances, I even recommend a psychologist or therapist as the case maybe. I noticed a trend though. Quite a lot of persons shy away from talking to people who can give them wise counsel. They may start and then not keep subsequent appointments. I wonder why that should be.

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Sometimes after trying endlessly to get them to talk to anyone else who can help, I let them be and just keep them in my prayers.  Truth is, I am a firm believer in the fact that God uses men… good men to help us out of situations that may seem bigger than us, in fact big enough to almost swallow us. I am definitely not implying that we should go about looking to men to solve ALL our problems. Hell no! God is the ultimate but I also believe that He doesn’t want us to shoulder it all alone.



Recently, especially towards the end of last year, I had MAJOR decisions I had to make. Trust me I had spent a lot of time praying especially in tongues about it. Then, I spoke to my Pastor. He prayed with me and advised me too. Then I spoke to a professional. He gave me professional advice and he is a Christian too so it was in line with God’s word. He broke it really down for me and laid all my choices before me. I also spoke to Bolaji. My Love is very wise ooo. I am so blessed to have him (And Bolaji, before you start gloating, I am quite a catch MYSELF ooo). Bolaji also advised me.



The thing was that in talking to them, especially as I heard myself talk, things became clearer for me. And at the end, I made the right decision. Incidentally, it was AFTER I spoke to these men that God gave me a Word. Or maybe I became sensitive enough to catch the Word. The bible says in the multitude of counsel there is safety and then we wage our war. No need just jumping into any and every battle blindly. I am tempted to say Google this verse on your own and then open your bible for yourself and see it for yourself. But nope, lemme help you out cos I really want you to see it…

Proverbs 11 v 14- Where no wise guidance is, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors is safety. TM puts it this way- Without good direction, the people lose their way, the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances.

Proverbs 24; 6 says For by wise counsel you can wage your war, and in an abundance of counselors there is safety and victory. TM says Strategic planning is key to warfare. To win, you need a lot of good counsel.

My NLT bible is far from me but if you can, please check it out there too.

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Human beings are assets ooo. You would argue with this if you have a lot of terrible people around you and I do not blame you. But please this is my SHOUT OUT to you to change your company deliberately. Humans are gifts to us. You only need to find the right ones; Pastors, Friends, colleagues. Some of life’s battles are bigger than us and we would need wise counsel to fight them. And age really has NOTHING to do with anything. If you listen to successful business men speak, you would most likely hear them refer at some point to sometime when they had to go to someone ahead of them to get business ideas. Not just business men ooo. In fact I was very surprised when I heard a very popular pastor say that once he was in a situation that was looking too big to him and he called his spiritual father who though was in a different town and runs an incredibly busy schedule, offer to come down to his base to help him out with it. That’s what Fathers and Elders are there for… To help us out in times like this especially when they have walked the part before us. Why would I now wanna do it on my own biko nu…? Who does that?

I was talking to a friend of mine recently and as we were sharing stories I realized that she was also at that point where she needed counsel and had spoken to two people and she ended up doing the right thing. I was also reading another girl’s blog and apparently she was sharing on how she had an issue and she spoke to her pastor and now it was all settled. Me I am NOT saying that we should not pray again ooo or just go and be telling everyone and their dog about our problems. No sweetheart, pray. Please pray. Like my momsie Joyce Meyer would say, before you run to the phone, run to the throne. Prayer should be our first and not second, third or even last resort.



I recall that day as I walked out of Rev’s office, the last thing he told me was ‘pray a lot in the spirit. Spend more and more time praying in the spirit for even more clarity… ‘. Please by all means, PRAY. Ask the Holy Spirit for divine guidance. I know that sometimes, even God would lead us to other people too who we can talk to to help. Sometimes it may even just be a clarification we need. Or a Word. Or even a hug. Oh, you do not know some hugs are spiritual abi? Wait let someone like Rev Jumoke Adeyemi hug you. I tell ya, you will get clarity sharp sharp.

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The interesting thing about this that I have figured out is that one reason people do not wanna seek counsel is that they DO NOT WANNA BE ACCOUNTABLE. I mean somewhere in their church minds, they know what to do but do not wanna do it. So when they now go to a higher authority, then they have committed themselves and they definitely DO NOT WANNA DO THAT so they end up going around in circles. Sweetheart, that is hardly the way to go. Some people, you go suffer suffer talk from now till tomorrow and then they will go right ahead and do what you have counseled them against. And then when they fall into trouble again, guess whose number they will call… Seriously, seeking counsel is one thing and flying with it is another. Then some other clowns will out rightly tell me that they DO NOT NEED ANYONE TO ADVISE THEM… yet you see them struggle through so much all alone. Seriously, who does that? Me ooo, I am not wired for stress at all. Why am I now surrounded by all these amazing people? Biko ooo.


Yeah I know some of us feel that our reputation would reduce with people when we talk to them. Then you do not have the right people around you to talk to. Seriously though, people should learn how to handle information especially when it is delicate. Especially people in positions of authority such as Pastors and all. You too should apply wisdom too as per who you share with. Once I really went out of line. I spoke TOTALLY to Rev. I was crying and speaking at the same time. I didn’t even care that my reputation would change or not with him because it didn’t even occur to me that he would attempt to play God and judge me. How now? I just poured my heart out and by the time I walked out of the office, I felt better at what he had told me. When next I saw him, we were good. No unnecessary reference to anything. WISE counsel. The operative word being WISE… because it is VERY easy to be wrongly advised by persons who know next to nothing and are just feeding you with their crazy opinions.

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Other times, we fear that they would use our story to preach at a later time or even write a book.

ROTFLMHO… seriously hun, I find this really funny.

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But seriously ooo as in really seriously, why is that a problem? It is not even like they would use your name now. I am sure any Pastor or counselor worth his salt will know how to present stories in order to leave the actor anonymous as much as possible where necessary. Plus it should also help that your story would help someone else. Because that is how me I see it ooo. I really do not mind if my story will help someone else. Especially when such people we have confided in are good people. Seriously, I can only pray that people reading my blog find people that they can turn to when they are in need of wise counsel… The major reason I love my Pastors is that they are really wise… In life affairs generally, not just spiritual stuff and they run such open door policies.


These days, You can even send letters anonymously or texts or phone calls. And keep your identity still hidden. In fact what I do sometimes is that if you share something with me and I am really clueless as to what to do and my emotions are getting the better of me, as I am a very emotional person, and you too do NOT want to go to someone higher especially when I feel that it is bigger than even me, I prayerfully seek wise counsel from someone who can help and as I recount the story, I make sure I have edited it very well so that the counselor doesn’t know who I am talking about. And then I can now tell the person what he or she should do. This applies to life generally. Do not think you can do it all on your own, I see such people and I laugh. Carrying weights that you DO NOT need to carry on your own. O ma ga ooo.


This group I spoke of in one of my recent posts, BABES! REDEFINED is an amazing female only Christian group and the kinda stuff ladies ask there are just something else. All sortsa stuff, from the spiritual to the carnal, to the carnally spiritual to the carnally carnal, to the downright hilarious… I see it all from these BABES! And then I take my time to read through the responses and I am usually wow-ed as to how much I learn from the godly counsel provided by fellow BABES! The group is really cool. If you wanna join and you are face book friend of mine, holler at me and I will invite you. I think it is a closed group and you have to be invited by a BABES! first. Or you could just holler and send me a face book friend request Eziaha Omoteniola Ajaero and I will add you. Please ooo for ladies only. Like I have said, age notwithstanding, we all need a lil or a lot of wise counsel from time to time. I pray again that readers of my blog will find the right persons who can give wise godly counsel when the need arises. Just like I have… And I am so thankful for them…

Seriously Love, you never have to walk alone. NEVER!!!

Stay winning…



I have used mostly my pictures here because I don’t want anybody to think I am talking about anybody ooo. Biko ooo people of the world. I am sure you people enjoyed seeing my very pretty self. The girl is fooiiinnnneeeee. Don’t hate…

3 Responses

  1. Reblogged this on The F.A.B. Sister's Blog and commented:

    So I was taking a stroll on the ‘FAB lane’ tonight (you too should sometimes) and I ‘ran into’ this amazing piece I wrote some two years ago, in my final year in UI.
    As with the Word of God, this post is still relevant today.
    I bless God for good godly relationships on three levels
    1. With those who look up to you
    2. With those on same level as you
    3. Your mentors/ogas
    We really should NEVER walk alone.
    Working on another group of FAB ladies like we had last year. Will let us know deets as soon as my lil Royal lets me. Loool.
    Now this post aside the deep truths within, also made me remember how vain I was. Lol. I loved my pictures mehn!!! See as I splash myself everywhere, tz almost embarrassing hehehe. I love the very first picture tho. I am gonna keep it within eye’s reach as MOTIVATION!!!
    I have a mentee who does same now with her blog. Writes exactly like me. Dee, you gonna cringe at your blog and all the gazillion pictures a few years down the line sha. Hahaha.
    But I LOVE reading her!!! Feel free to visit her blog too and see the comparison of which I speak. https://xtainchicblogs.wordpress.com/
    Btw Dee, we should totally lose the ‘wordpressdotcom’. Holler at me let’s sort that out…
    Ok guys, enjoy the post. Tz quite a long read while I attend to my booboo KingDaveed


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