Ije nwa…My Birth Story

It was at my 41st week appointment, on a Tuesday that the OBGYN I was seeing said 
‘…If this baby doesn’t come by Sunday, please come in for an induction. We need to get this baby out and he is growing bigger and bigger…’
Prior to then, I had NEVER read up on what induction entailed. I just knew it was a NO/NO for me. Occasionally, I would bump into posts on BabyCentre board for February mamas and I’ll just gloss over it. Once at ANC, I heard a 2nd time mom mention that she was induced and it was PAINFUL!!! ‘not my portion biko’ I had said to a friend. Now this???
Prior to then, I was having dreams (Bolaji would tell me later he too had dreams) that something happened to either I or the baby. After that report, I cut off communication from EVERYBODY and entered ‘The Secret place’. Time to fight to retain my victory. Of cos my mom and sis knew and so did Rev Femi and then Bolaji’s Pastor from Winners and they all prayed with me that I’ll labour naturally before the date set by the doctor. And then I told a FEW friends. Well now I think of it, aside my doctor bestie Valerie, I think it was only one person I told lol and then cut off too. I prayed, confessed, danced, jumped upandan, etc. Momsie said I should take castor oil to speed things up but thankfully before then, Valerie had already warned me not to ever try am incase anybody suggest. Then my sis told me how she too was delayed with her first child and our family doctor kept telling her not to try that castor oil thing. Anyways, I no try anything at all. I siddon dey wait. No braxton hicks. No bloody show. No water breaking. No engagement. No Nothing!!! Nwata no n’agbati ukwu n’ime ahu mmadu… Sigh
Saturday night was the AMVCAs and as I watched with hubs (Blossom Chuwkwujekwu was my star of the night. Of course, err’one loves my brother OC Ukeje), I jumped upandan, sideways, etc. Nothing happened. 
Sunday morning, I got up, showered and carry bag to dey go hospital in time for my 8am, hubs was like ‘mba, let’s go to church FIRST’. So we waka go church. I recall a midwife who told me how to comport myself and all… After church, I had lunch then hubs, momsie and I went to the hospital. I texted Rev and Pastor M to update them and told them to ring Bolaji for further info not me. Twas well past 2pm now. So we were directed to prenatal ward where I would be admitted and Bolaji given some stuff to buy for the cervical sweep. The Doctor was expected at about 7am so I said I was going home please to return when the doc comes. Everyone convinced me to stay. I agreed and took a bed. Hubs and momsie stayed a while and left. At about 8pm, d Doc came. Dr Lawal. Amazing young man. I had seen him at an earlier ANC session (37/38 weeks) so we were quite familiar and he yabbed me cos I had told him the next time we see, it will be in labour/with my baby. Now see me about to be induced. Lol. He took his time to explain how the sweep works and then if it fails twice, we enter theatre. When I saw all the things they were passing into my body through my *** and sticking out, I fear small lol. If it was successful, the ball would drop, cervical dilatation in progress and labour will commence in a couple of hours. He now yabbed me that I was too much of an ajebutter so he hopes he won’t be on duty when I fall into labour cos tz people like me that have the most drama during delivery. Lol. The sweep was uncomfy but didn’t hurt, plus the doctor was amazeballs. That done, I went to sleep. Woke up several times in the night hoping for any sign. Thankfully, the bloody show happened and then nothing else. Ball no drop. Choi!!! 
That was Day 1. Sunday. 
Next day, twas a different doctor and he was to repeat the sweep by afternoon. For some reason he was unavailable till evening and I kept hoping the ball would drop. Finally he appeared in the evening, took the catheter and stuff out, and requested for something else to repeat the procedure. Hubs left to get it and by then, I was EXHAUSTED!!! Repeat what???!!! Mba. I entered the toilet, locked myself in and CRIED to God. I said I didn’t want a repeat. Dilatation had to begin. I spoke to EVERY part of my body involved in delivery, took my confessions, washed my face and then went downstairs to the Doc. My pipu, dude checked me and was like NO NEED to repeat, cervix has started dilating. Hallelujah!!!!!
So I was moved to the labour ward. And was told ‘anytime now’. By then, they had stopped me from eating. This was about 9pm. I think I was about 4cm dilated. 
Lemme give a pictoral description of the ward. First, the hospital was one of these new ones Fashola built. Amazing place. Maternal and Child centre MCC. I was in the one in Festac. The draw back it has and I absolutely hate is that men are hardly allowed in. Obviously cos the women are pratically naked as they scream lol. So unless tz REALLY important, no men. And just being by your side during labour is not classed as ‘important’ lol. 
Ok so there were about 6/7 beds in the labour ward then there was an inner room which was the delivery room with those half-beds and stuff for pushing. There were two beds there. The idea was that when you are in labour, you are in the labour ward and when you are close to popping (9/10cm dilated), you are moved to the inner room where baby comes. Is that how it is in other hospitals???
The labour ward was crazy all night. Women screaming and confessing all their sins. I kid you not. It was real drama. If it wasn’t serious I would have been rolling in laughter. But it was also beautiful because soon after all the screams, the baby is here and the woman is all smiles. Awwwww. One woman, a primi too, gave birth in the car. Plenty women delivered right on their beds before they could be moved to the delivery room. Women screaming ‘I want to poopoo ooo’ lol and by then, the midwives know this baby is about to pop. It was real something ooo but everywhere around me, people were ‘borning’ and being moved to post natal ward. More people would come in in labour, shout, born, move upstairs. The hospital was super busy. Eziaha Aya Bolaji was there all night!!! No further progress in labour. NOTHING!!! As if say I came to watch the drama. The hospital was super busy. Whatever happened to my speedy Hebrew styled delivery? Kai. Anyways, I slept when I could but I didn’t stop praying. 
That was Day 2, Monday. 

Come Tuesday morning, the labour ward busyness continued. The first person that checked me said I was 6cm gone. The next person who checked 1/2hours later now said I was still 4cm. Say what?!?!?! Are we dilating forward or backward? Choi!!! Anyways, I wasn’t in any pain so no pee. After noon, they started injecting me with oxytocin!!! That was the beginning of the REAL induction. My sister had yabbed me that when that one starts, I’ll stop taking calls loool. 
At about 2pm, the consultant OBGYN came for her rounds and she checked me. People of God, I was still 4cm!!! Despite the oxytocin ooooooo. They increased the speed, and she checked my tummy and the baby and said ‘THIS BABY IS BIG!!! Why did you guys let this woman get to 42weeks!!!??? You should have booked her for this induction earlier!!!’
Anyways, the conso then gave her verdict-
If in the next 2 hours there is NO significant improvement, then we have to TAKE A DECISION.
Long and short, I enter theatre. She wrote it in my case note then she went home. 
Ish got real!!! I rang my Rev for the first time and he prayed with me that things would speed up. I was TIRED&HUNGRY. Hadn’t eaten for a bit plus I was even getting tired of confessing. I just wanted the baby OUT however but I really didn’t wanna be sectioned. Bolaji kept telling me to be strong. I kept ‘Miracle worker by Glowreeyah ft Nathaniel Bassey’ on replay. I kept confessing. But I was tired. And hugely uncomfy!!! I wasn’t in any pain but the discomfort was MAD!!! My bestie Sapphire’s (who had had a baby some 4months earlier) advice kept ringing 
‘No matter what you do, don’t stop your confessions’
Around me women were still acting Nollywood movies loooool but still borning anyhow. Twas too funny I promise. Infact a good number delivered before they could be taken into the delivery room. Many women were pooping anyhow on the bed. Big fat poop forerunning the baby hehehe. Bear in mind that 2hours was 4.30pm. In the meantime, Eziaha was watching cinema lol. 
Then the Doctor who was on duty came and saw the notes the Conso had written. This was where the scenario between Pharaoh and the midwives who feared God came to play. 
The Doctor decided that NO, this lady is a primi (first timer) and she is ‘…NOT progressing poorly’. So he decided to again increase the oxytocin dose and said he will give more than the Conso alloted and he left me. He tried to break my waters to speed things up BUT I was too ‘high up’. Mehn!!! After that increased dose, I started to feel some real pain. Kai. But screaming was not something I was doing. I was conserving my energy to push biko. The pain wasn’t unbearable. The Oxytocin was messing up my system big time but I was a composed mama in labour. Btw, I don’t think I was feeling any contractions at all. I’ll say why I said that later. I just relaxed and I think I must have slept off. 4.30pm came and went and the doctor no answer me sef. Bolaji had been outside so he rang me to know what’s up. I updated him and kept resting. Btw I was receiving calls and texts from the few people who knew I was in labour – dad, mom, sis, MIL and Dr Valerie. Btw Vee had a friend who worked in that hospital so she ordered him to keep checking on me. 
People of God, the next time I came to, (and I no look time ooo) it was with the urge to poo… I was CONVINCED I wanted to poo. So the midwife of course said NO and decided to check me. I was 9cm dilated!!!! Called Bolaji and told him and the man did a HUGE heave of relief. Hahahaha. Igbo says it better…
Nwoke mmadu eku shia ume looool. 
Giri Giri Giri Giri, they moved me to the delivery room. Ngwa Eziaha PUSH!!! Absolutely NO power. The midwife begged, cajoled, threatened, etc. No show. At some point, she held my hand and prayed with me. She told me she could SEE the head and she made me feel it but to push na story lol. There were two docs in the room and they were all like ‘babe you have come this far. If you don’t push, na theatre next ooo. Don’t spoil your record ooo. This is your first baby blablabla’
No power to push. And you know you push with contractions. I wasn’t feeling any nonsense contractions. Lol. So the doctors (now 4 plus Valerie’s friend) would palpitate my tummy and say ‘ok now you are contracting, PUSH…’
I go push. No show. 
I heard them say my contractions were very weak hence my not feeling them. (dr N, please explain:))
Anyways at some point, they told me not to rest anymore. At the next contraction, PUSH until the head is out. Then two doctors held me up when the next contraction came and they kept screaming PUSH PUSH PuuuuuuuuuuuSH. Tz almost here, almost out dont stop, puuuuuuusssssshhhhhh. My people, I borrowed energy from my ancestors and puuuuuussshhhheeeeeedddddd while they cut me to assist. 
The head came out hallelujah and I just chilled. I was too weak to do anything else. They pulled the baby out and next thing I heard was
‘wow, that’s a big baby. No wonder’. 
Time was 7:13pm. March 10, in the year of our Lord 2015. 
They immediately put him on my body for some precious skin-to-skin priceless moments after which they took him away. 
Oh btw, they broke my waters at some point on the delivery bed. But the midwife said ‘kai this was a messy delivery’. I wasn’t sure but I felt I was loosing blood. Placenta came out without drama about 5mins later and I was like Yaaaay finally. Then they started stitching me up. 
Interestingly, my ‘neighbor’ in the ward who delivered same time as me had a ‘very neat delivery’ but the drama that followed placenta was major. WOW!!! Ije Nwa. It was her second baby. Ok back to me. 
People of the world, this is where the real drama started. I dunno what happened but I felt like it was a slow tap flowing outta me. Wham, I was knocked out with a general anesthetic. It was an incredible feeling like I was in utopian paradise lol. I guess that’s the same feeling those who do drugs have hehehe. 
Meanwhile they had given my baby to his daddy who was waiting in the lobby and right on time, my mom walked in and saw him too. So they had sent Bolaji to buy some things for me. 
After what seemed like forever, I came to. But was MAJOR drowsy. Some assistant or so was cleaning out the delivery room so I asked her to assist me out so I could lie down properly in the ward. I tried to stand and was too drowsy so I lay back. I asked for my phones and water which I was given. Spoke to hubs and my mom wanted to know what I would eat. 
‘Indomie, fried egg and COLD water please’
(Sorry I don’t believe in don’t drink cold water plus they debunked it at ANC) 
Anyways I was still drowsy and after I texted like 3 friends, my phone dropped to the floor and I couldn’t pick it. The nurse picked and seized it and ordered me to REST. Meanwhile hubs had gone home with momsie to get the food. And COLD water. Lol. 
My dears, second attempt to get up I was still drowsy and then I asked for a wheel chair. I really needed a full length bed. My body hurt. Meanwhile I think my baby was asleep beside my bed in the labour ward. 
Third attempt with the wheel chair and 4 people, I got up slowly and from the putting my leg down to the floor, rising and getting into the wheel chair, Eziaha mama KingDaveed fell to the floor and passed out. 
Yes through the 4ppl, (2male docs, 1 female doc and one axillary nurse) I fell to the ground. I guess they weren’t expecting it so before they could blink, I was on the floor. They didn’t move me from that position till I came to. I was like 
‘…what am I doing on the floor?’ 
Lol. 
‘Just shut up and stay still…’
Nobody was taking any chances. They got a more senior doctor, carried me right back UP to the half bed/table and examined me to be sure nothing ‘dabaru’d’ when I fell. 
Children of God, something dabaru’s ooo. So they were gonna repeat the stitches. Ok no wahala abi?
Only this time, nobody was giving me whether partial, local or general anaestetia. I had lost a LOT of blood so they felt knocking me out may knock me to my Chukwu Abiama in heaven finally. I was going to be stitched whilst feeling ALL that pain. 
Oh NOOOOOOO!!!!!
That was when I turned on the waterworks. I was TIRED!!! What sorta rubbish is this. I cried and cried and cried even before they started. 
They told me I could do it. It was a minor suture. Encouragement left right and centre. I braced myself. 
Meanwhile hubby had come back thinking ‘ehen the worst is over, she don born’ only for him to hear from a doctor-in-motion
‘Mr Bolaji, your wife just fainted…’
Kai!!! Devuuuuu lol. 
Anyways he waited outside while they did it and umu nne’m na umu nna’m n’ime Chineke, I saw nwinnnnn… I ‘chested’ it BUT the last suture, I SCREAMED!!! That was my FIRST scream ever and Bolaji heard it from outside. 
Ugh!!!
The worst over abi? Oh well, nobody was moving me from that delivery table. I stayed there till the next day. They had sent for blood while my PCV was checked. Praise Jehovah, all the blood of Jesus in my body which I had been swallowing daily during especially my last pregnancy trimester ensured I didn’t get transfused. My mama sef was soooo against it. So I got my prescriptions for pain reliefs and blood capsules. 

Meanwhile, they had taken my booboo to neonatal to run some tests because he came out big. 

Early the next morning, the matron/midwife on duty decided to move me. I was carried like an egg and instructed to keep my eyes permanently closed during the maybe 30m move. Yup it was that short a distance and according to her, I was passing out again. But we made it and I was carried to a bed where I could stretch leg thank God. Choi!!! 
By day break, my fave doc was back on the rounds and he practically dragged me upstairs to go and bond with my baby and establish breastfeeding or ‘he will love his father more than you’ lol. God bless that doc. I did and I’m grateful I did. Seeing my baby and knowing he came outta me was a feeling that can’t be put in words. Like THIS is all mine???
I was discharged the next day with all the instructions but my baby was gonna be watched for 5days!!! Choi. Anyways last last, we left the hospital the next Monday afternoon just in time for the christening which was Tuesday. My head didn’t stop aching for like 2weeks!!! And I made sure to NOT allow visitors yet because I needed REST. Afterall, neither I nor the baby was running away. 
Ije nwa… the journey to mommyhood. Tz not a small something ooo. I heard and saw sooooo many stories in those days I was in the hospital that I haven’t stopped thanking God. Was gonna name him ‘Chiwetel’ as his igbo name but when momsie brought her own ‘Somtochukwu’ I dumped mine. Cos truly, Oluwasemilore (God has done me well) so Somtochukwu (join me in praising God)

When a woman enters the labour ward and comes out alive and with a baby IRRESPECTIVE of HOW she gave birth, please celebrate and thank God. I knew TWO ladies who did ANC with me who lost their babies. Too painful. Don’t open your dirty mouth and be asking ‘did she push or was it CS?’ That’s just plain stupid. I used to be like that. Not anymore. Any kinda delivery is a testimony. ANY!!!
Yesterday, we dedicated KingDaveed to our God forever.

When I think back on all I went through and how Chi’m saw me through, I komole’d, shoki’d, and did all kindsa dances. 
I look at my baby daily and still don’t fully believe he is ALL MINE!!! Azzin nobody will come and take him away?

Chukwu biko n’ara ekele… imeeeela. Onu’m juru n’ekele. Thank You. 
And thank You for another year. Lezz do dis boo… #GraceStyle
Happy birthday to this HOT Kimk bod loading mama…
Blessings this week y’all!!!
Love&Light
E’

PS:
Look ehn, this story is NOT to scare anyone. You want it better, Hebrew style to the letter? You sure can have it. I just thought to share this with y’all plus I loved reading Heather Lindsey’s own. Btw, did you miss that rhyme? Better…Letter. 
DonJazzy come get a sister!!!

PPS
Weekend bants will be up this week. Been mad busy with trips and events and all and I cannot coman goan kee myself biko. Tainzzz. Btw #3NITSP was #nowords. Plus I met some of my readers too yaaaaay. And some friends I see just once a year at WWW lol. 
Have a blessed week err’one…

PPPS
My internet is crappy. Can’t attach much pictures and hyperlinks.  Will do that sometime this week so check again amd again.  Cos i have pictures to help my story. I am soooo upset o can’t add all the pictures.  Will try again soon and then re blog