Hey Fabs…
I hope it is feeling increasingly like Xmas to err’one… The Island wears a beautiful look… Like my Brother said, if u find yourself at Falomo at night, u would really know that a Savior was born… Ditto Roundabout in VI… It literarily take your breath away… I hope I am able to capture the beauty soon… I hear Lagos State budgeted just short of 100million Naira for decorations… *smiles*
So on to the next embarassing moments… Meanwhile una can like gist sha… U won’t believe the kinda ‘off-line’ buzz this writeup generated…
So about the airport embarassment…
Sometime in October, I was flying to PH from gidi… Departure time 7.15am which meant I had2be there at 6.45 bla bla… U know their drill… Just that I didn’t work out my transport modalities earlier. Twas that morning Your’s sincerely started looking for Cabs and ish… So even though I left my house in plenty of time, at 7am I was just getting dropped at the airport. I was with a guy who said that he was sure I had missed my flight already cos they would have finished with Passes and all… In recent times, on the same PH route, aero had delayed me some so I figured that day would be business as usual… Mehn, I got to the Counter and they were done giving Passes. We were like 4 latecomers…One ‘bigman’ was shouting at d Lady saying how it was at the Counter he was delayed being that he got their early and stuff. The rest of us were in a bit of a Grovel mode… My phonetics didn’t even fly with the rather haughty Lady at d Counter. Lokked like she could match me phonetics for phonectics so I just calmed down and begged… Finally after we had stroked her ego enough, she grudgingly let us go… No need to check in luggages… She said we were already at d risk of missing the flight anyways… At that point, we were on fast forward, especially the last 2. I and some Banker dude I guess… So we ran, I forgot all about fabulousity. Thankfully I had d good sense to ditch my high heels and wear flats. What good luck!!! Usually I travel with at least 3inches…as a rule. I dunno why, other than to oppress the rest of y’all… Cos I already tower at 5ft 11… So I cab afford to ditch the heels… But no!!! I want to tower over err’one. Anyways actually I walk more elegantly that’s d primary reason m always wearing them…
So that day sha, I had on flats, so we ran, lucky for me I had just my handbag and another Bag… After all d numerous checks, I finally got to the Shuttle excited and happy that we had made it… Only for me to realize that I forgot my second bag at one of the checks… The very first one!!!! That annoying one that scans your body and luggage, then makes you bring out almost everything in your bag and pocket and put them in buckets to be scanned…then remove ur footwear before u cross… that’s was where Eziaha, daughter of Ajaero chose to forget her bag… Aaaarrrrggghhhh…
I was beyond upset and sad… I knew turning back to get it meant missing the flight especially as every Official we passed kept saying ‘we hope u make it, the plane z almost gone’ Chai!!!
I had no choice, I had to turn back…
This time, all dignity thrown to the wind, I ran even more wildly…no time to catwalk again… The other guy who was with me had no choice but to go on without me… Afterall tz not like he knew me from Adam… And he had been gentlemanly enough already…
Eziaha was now on my own… I ran… Oh I ran!!! If u got a video, u would have laughed at me for life… People were staring… For some reason, the airport was not rowdy… So I was quite the Centre of attention… By d time I got to my bag, I was totally drained… I picked it, packed it and ran all the way back… And I had really long braids that were just getting in the way. Gosh I cut the picture of frazzled and harried… Need I say it was well past 7.15am now… Almost 7.20am… I was just like after running like a mad woman around MM, I better not even miss this flight…
Well, ladies and gentlemen, the final Security post didn’t even bother to stop me… She was soooo nice after seeing all he drama which even included running up the electronic stairs that are designed to only bring people down… Kai… She was like I hope u make it.
Anyways Sisthren and Brethren I got to the terminal and the Shuttle thankfully was waiting for me… The Gentleman found a way to make them wait… And then there was a Big time Politician too whose name I will leave out in the shuttle and all of them, seeing my sorry state were all… Sorry, it happens! At least u made it!!! Blablabla. Twas sweet of them… Driver zoomed and of course the Pilot was almost taxing off sef…
The Gentleman was asking me where my seat was and I hardly answered sef… I just waltzed to my seat…
But d funniest tin happened when I got on board!!! The Plane was full of only white men… Like 7/8th of the Capacity, at least as far as I could see…
Given all I had gone thru, I wouldn’t have minded if that plane was going to heathrow abeg…
But no show, twas PHcity… Of course I’m sure they were going for an oil related project. I was sandwiched between a nice African with an accent I could eat, and a boring Brit who apparently had a lot on his mind cos he didn’t answer my hello till I poked him… The nice African (I later realised was from the Northern part of Naija) was all sweetness… He was like ‘ Don’t worry, I’m sure the Pilot would have waited for you seeing how pretty you are’ or something like that…
Yes! Planes are the best place to flirt harmlessly… Wink wink…
But I wasn’t flirting. Neither was he!!! He was just being nice. Dude, who is old enough to be my older sister’s father btw, prayed his rosary all through… He said he usually does this evertimt he flies locally in small plane or in any BA plane…
Ladies and Gentlemen, the flight went on without anymore drama. Landed at To 9 and then by 1pm. I had done 3major types of transport in Nigeria… Road, Air and Sea… Yes I was enroute Bonny Island and that Boat ride was something I won’t easily forget…
One lesson I learnt though, I can best express it in Igbo…
E mee ngwangwa, emeaghri odachi…
Now let me gloss through the elevator experience…
Oh well, I don’t feel up to writing about it now. Someday I probably will… Long and short I got stuck in an elevator and I felt life draining through me… I was so so scared. I almost died before help came… Infact, I’ll end with this… Life is sweet…
Hope u enjoyed reading…
Kisses…
E
be kind to one another
xx
Fab Black Sister
Ok first forgive the typos… Was in a hurry…
And by Island roundabout that looks xmasey, I meant Ajose Adeogun roundabout. The Zenith bank street.
And when I say, the Island looks nice I mean VI, Ikoyi and environs…:-)
I wish I was there to see all this with my eyes!! I’ve seen the Island lately one night.
Dis babe yaff want to kee me. Heathrow ko, Van Nuys ni ahahaha. I can’t seem to get d image of u running back & forth outa my head. Trying to imagine some prim looking chic sprinting mehn, tew funny.
As for d decoration, passed around der 1 evening & I was wondering if I had somehow driven into my very own disney. Pple were around d place snapping & stuff. Very beauriful somthing.
P.S: u just gained a follower so come & update abeg. Haba, since dec
Hahahahhaha,girl m rollin wt laughter.beautiful 1 u jst made my morning cs I went 2 bed sad.inbtw,we got same height n yea I lik 2 tower evry1 wt ma heels,som don’t jst get y I hav 2 b on heels wt my height bt u knw wt dey say-u step better wit dem.hope u got d cntact of d guy wt swallowable accent*wink*
One word, Fabulous! Just seeing this. U should post more. I still bliv in u…
Damn rite! U write gud dear.luv dis piece.jus havin 2pix d episodes has got my ribs crackin.tnx,u v sure made my wkend.gues urz kul too.